Lockdown, Unemployment, and Loss: A lot of us haven’t had it easy recently.
Lockdown for one, has taken a toll on our mental health, with still not being able to hug friends or family outside our households, and being forced to adapt to a new way of life.
Even with lockdown rules relaxing it is causing us some unease. Some people are more comfortable with going out to pubs and others are happy to play sports with large numbers of people. Personally I’m still a little wobbly about a lot of things;
It took me a few weeks after climbing centres opened up again to brave enough to go. When the centres are a little busier I am very aware of the amount of people in there which does put me a bit on edge.
And on Wednesday I had a day of doing new thinks! I went to pub/restaurant for the first time AND went to some charity shops
I am slowly getting more comfortable with doing ‘normal’ things again and I am taking my time to go at my own pace with this (WHICH IS OKAY).
As I’ve said in previous posts (Graduating from home and Class of 2020 graduates search for closure) as a new graduate, life is very overwhelming. There’s a lot of pressure to find a job or have a 5 year career goal plan.
I’m still finding my feet in what I want to do, I enjoy writing and being creative on social media so I want to keep doing it – and that’s kinda all I have to go on. I know I am underselling myself here but sometimes that’s all I feel I have to go on, but when the only responses you are getting to job applications are rejections it’s how I found myself feeling a lot of the time.
Rejection is inevitable, and it is because at this point in time I wasn’t right for the jobs I have applied to, but after a few it really does begin to take a toll on your self esteem.
Thankfully after getting this job rejection (which I was really devastated about as I was really keen for the role and excited about it) I went on a walk with my lovely friend Chris where we just had a mutual moan about the graduate and job market situation right now. I just felt a billion times better letting myself have a moan then taking in the fresh air to help me put my pieces back together. We also had a great catch up (Chris if you’re reading this, thanks for the walk, we should go again soon!).
The point I’m trying to make here is that things don’t always go your way and something you think you are perfect for isn’t necessarily for you, and that’s okay.
It probably will take a toll on your self-esteem a bit– it did for me and that’s also okay. It’s the putting yourself together again to try again that is the important thing. If you don’t keep trying you won’t get anything.
I have recently been reaching out to people for advice (which is keeping me on the right track) and a short Internship opportunity has come up which I am very excited about. I am soon to start as a content creator writing blog posts, doing a bit of PR, and some social media work for a stay cations website. I’m really excited to continue building on my experiences and skills. I’m glad that things are starting to look up for me – if you are swill waiting; keep trying, something will come.
Loss is another thing that has affected me massively recently. I am finding it very helpful to come to terms with it by talking about how I feel and the wonderful memories I have of my Nain.
I have recently written a feature trying to normalise conversations around death which I think is so important right now considering the higher death rates than ‘normal’ due to covid. I am in the midst of pitching this feature to magazines, so fingers crossed that will get published and I will be able to share it with you soon (A lot of the stuff I want to say around this topic is in that feature).
To help me process and move on, my Mum and I are planning a trip soon to Nain’s flat and are going to tie it in with a trip wild camping on the Brecon Beacons.
To anyone also grieving for a loved one, it will get easier and it’s important to open up conversations about death to help you process it. It will begin to feel better I Promise x
Whatever challenges you are facing I wish you well and hope that things begin to look up for you soon.
We will be able to look back on the darker patches in our lives and see how much we have grown since then. If you are struggling with anything please reach out and talk to someone — it’s okay to take things at your own pace.
Thanks for reading, you lot are truly the best for reading my weekly posts. I’ll see you next week with something new.
Look after yourselves x
Ps. what do you think of the new logo and new look on the blog?