I’ve been hesitating about writing this post for may reasons. Some being; I’m not a typical ‘student’, I’m nervous about going back and don’t want to be negative on here. BUT I want to get over that anxiety and self consciousness because I’m sure many others are feeling the same as me and hopefully I can be of some help. So whether you are going into first year or are starting your final year like me, hopefully this midweek special blog post will be of some use or reassurance.
(the photos I’ve used throughout are of my lovely housemates)
So even though I’ve met many lovely people and made amazing friendships, I still get nervous about seeing everyone again as if over the summer break something might have changed and they’ve become different people or overnight have decided the last thing they want to do is live with me. I know this is extreme but when I get in my head about it I reach the ridiculous conclusions. Thankfully going on holiday to Jersey with my housemates has settled these anxieties and as soon as I saw them everything felt normal again. So if you’re like me rest assured, it is mostly likely in your head, if your friends are friends with you in the first place they are still going to be when you go back. I’m now incredibly excited to see them again and live with them for one more year! (look at their cute faces: how was I even nervous about seeing them!?)
On the flip side if you are yet to go to uni and haven’t met anyone yet when you get there you will feel so much better. Talking to your future housemates on a Facebook chat is not the same, when you get there and talk to them in real time and have a few drinks you will feel way better. Worst case scenario; even if they don’t end up being your best mates (like all but one of mine from first year), you will still be friendly with them and everyday you will be meeting new people. Just in the first couple weeks make sure you are saying yes to events and are keeping your door open.
With uni comes new pressures like the basic looking after yourself away from home and even bigger deadlines. I know from the last two years I’ve spent at uni that this is all doable and completely fine with a bit of time management. But that doesn’t stop me from being incredibly anxious about my 3rd year with even bigger projects like my dissertation and then the looming fear of whats to come after uni. I don’t know what I want to do yet, so what do I do and where do I go after I graduate? I know many students feel the same way especially those on my subject (ENGLISH LIT) that if you don’t want to go into teaching the options feel endless but limited to if you don’t know which field you want to specialise in. But then it seems silly stressing this much about after uni when I’ve still got a LONG time till I graduate! The thing is, I know I’m not alone in this too!
My course mate Kieran shared similar fears and views on this and has explained it way better than me so please go check his post out (and some of his other posts while you are there): https://keirancrying.com/2019/09/02/university-anxiety-final-year-crisis/
so WHY are we all so stressed about the future? (this doesn’t even have to be necessarily uni related) WHY is there so much pressure on doing well and having a plan for life? Ultimately we will all get there in our own time our space but it feels like A to Z should be simple and easy but really life kinda goes A to E to G to I and back to B and so on. The 5 or 10 or 15 year plan we all dream of never happens the way we see it but we always end up somewhere and happy doing what we are doing even if it’s not what we expect. And if I keep telling myself that I can relax a little and enjoy my last year at uni without stressing about what comes after because maybe then I’ll have some idea or something I want to do that I currently don’t have any idea about, and that makes the future exciting and less scary.
One stupid thing is making me lazy about going back to uni is the idea of packing. It can seem super daunting packing your life away to move to a new place for the first time but this is my 3rd time so I don’t have that excuse anymore… I just really hate packing! But I do have a list that I sue every year of things that i need (admittedly this is female specific so if you are a guy maybe feel free to leave out the sanitary towels) Hopefully this list will help anyone who is yet to pack:
I hope this has been helpful or reassuring to any one who is having any anxiety Or worries. Drop me a message if you can relate or have any questions 🙂 Thanks for reading and all the best to everyone going to or back to uni x